Simple is not the same as easy.

There’s a bittersweet reality to therapy. Outside of skills or techniques, you have the necessary ingredients for growth already in you. Sometimes, there’s a perspective shift you gain, yet commonly, people have a subtle realization rather than a seismic shift.

There does seem to be a common thread for some, though. The unhelpful expectation is for complex solutions to their pain. When you hear feedback, I encourage you to be open to simple solutions. Although being a server is simple, no one doubts it to be an easy job.

Where therapy fills the space between less subtle “go for a walk every morning/day,” and “box breathing” is learning how you specifically respond to the use of those behaviors. The way our brains create associations is unique to each person. This uniqueness requires awareness of what works for you and humbleness that you’re likely not the exception to every skill.

Most of my clients who do journal benefit significantly from it. Others find writing distressing and that’s not helpful for catharsis and growth. Therapy then explores the experience within writing to find if there are various journaling techniques that may help more or if there’s a misconception of what journaling “should be.”

For example, there doesn't have to be structure to your writing, unless various prompts help you begin. Frequency and intensity of your journaling can change too (it doesn't “have to” be every day). I find on days I experience more emotions and choose to journal, a prompt from google, ai, or a premade journal, helps dust the rust off and gets me focused on the value of journaling. Perhaps maybe it'll be more helpful to have a diary to vent to and a journal to respond compassionately to the venting and begin supporting yourself. Even though journaling may seem “too simple” to help, recognizing it's not easy and having a realistic expectation with open effort does help.

Nevertheless, you likely have all the requisite awareness you could tap into with enough focus, learning, and self-development. However, there’s seldom a replacement for the expertise a therapist can guide you through to unlock the barrier to your continued growth.